sorry.
yes. its a week away before the Olvl written papers actually begin, and i suddenly realize how emotionally attached one can get to another of his own.
depression, you may call it.
now, here i am, with no1 to run to, with nowhere to run to. except maybe save 2.
no, i dont think i have read anything too far albeit not based on stable evidence.
'pink background'?
i think that speaks loud enough. but more than logical deduction, its the gut feeling that tells me that i've committed some terrible offence against another. unfortunately, my gut instinct cant tell me what that offence is.
this brings backs familiar feelings dating as far as one and a half years back. we didnt exactly start our freindship with a bang. but we, or should i now say i, always took pride in being able to go through it. than again, did we really? now that i've come to think of it, it was cleared up in a most boyish way. kept down and quiet and everyone assumed that it was ok. i daresay i've long forgotten how it started, but i believe that i was of cause to blame.
that has always been the way we've settled issues. never up front, never direct. some friendship huh? while i might consider him my best friend, i sometimes do wonder how he views me? some scrawny little nobody who has the great privellage to be in his team and a pathetic school blunder who needs help in everything.
i've always revered him as one of the world's finest creations in all aspects, outside and inside. and in that perfect skin of his, he doesnt ever once show off. he might be proud of his achievments, which every human being has the right to be of, but he takes effort to ensure everyone gets encouraged after every feat or defeat.
speaking of which, i just want to say this. hell yes i might be hubristic and arrogant, but as far as i'm concerened, thats my own perogative. afterall, thats my driving mechanism.
sigh.
things get so complicated. half a year back, i was less of a friend. very much less. sidekick maybe, but friend? far far from it. instead, he had another. the 2 of them were like one, in a most safe sense. i was the third party butting in between the 2 of them, trying to squeeze into their conversations. i was often leftout, un-notified and had to fill myself in. never once before have i ever gotten a firsthand account from either of them. never.
but i pressed on. it was lamentable that some misfortune happened along the way and the 2 of them were no longer friends. i make my entrance here.
i saw it coming. of course i did.
it was verbaly foretold of through an interesting device known as the telephone.
maybe i could have salvaged the situation than.
i did try, but did i put in my utmost best?
i darent answer that question.
i was to some extent even secretly happy. i hate myself for feeling so.
what kind of friend was i? i dont really know. i just hope when others see this, they dont think - it revolved all around you.
there was a time i remebered, i asked, are you busy?
yeah.
ok, than i shant bother you.
after the 'break up',
are you busy?
kinda, but its ok.
sure? otherwise i'll bother you with chem.
yeah, yeah, what's the question? polymers? here's how.
now, i think its rather palpable that he's not in his best mood. i fear i might have triggered it off without my knowledge. but the conversation is more like the former.
i'm beginning to recall how he's put up with my nitty-gritty peccadillos.
this obviously isnt structured in any way. sometimes, you cant structure emotions, especially so when one's head is muddled between foreign currency and emotional investment. i know this is generally poorly written and doesnt truly reflect the tears shed after the phonecall.
team1 05 did well. won all 3 preliminary rounds. never mind the slight mess up in quaters. we're still very proud that you've managed to go thus far. abt the interpretation, better now than later. honestly, i prefer the NUS shield than one bearing NKF. maybe thats why there isnt one.
i'm in the mood to tinkle an Em9 on fresh acoustic strings and scream into nothingness with oasis- stop crying your heart out as background music.
yes. its a week away before the Olvl written papers actually begin, and i suddenly realize how emotionally attached one can get to another of his own.
God help me.
yes. its a week away before the Olvl written papers actually begin, and i suddenly realize how emotionally attached one can get to another of his own.
depression, you may call it.
now, here i am, with no1 to run to, with nowhere to run to. except maybe save 2.
no, i dont think i have read anything too far albeit not based on stable evidence.
'pink background'?
i think that speaks loud enough. but more than logical deduction, its the gut feeling that tells me that i've committed some terrible offence against another. unfortunately, my gut instinct cant tell me what that offence is.
this brings backs familiar feelings dating as far as one and a half years back. we didnt exactly start our freindship with a bang. but we, or should i now say i, always took pride in being able to go through it. than again, did we really? now that i've come to think of it, it was cleared up in a most boyish way. kept down and quiet and everyone assumed that it was ok. i daresay i've long forgotten how it started, but i believe that i was of cause to blame.
that has always been the way we've settled issues. never up front, never direct. some friendship huh? while i might consider him my best friend, i sometimes do wonder how he views me? some scrawny little nobody who has the great privellage to be in his team and a pathetic school blunder who needs help in everything.
i've always revered him as one of the world's finest creations in all aspects, outside and inside. and in that perfect skin of his, he doesnt ever once show off. he might be proud of his achievments, which every human being has the right to be of, but he takes effort to ensure everyone gets encouraged after every feat or defeat.
speaking of which, i just want to say this. hell yes i might be hubristic and arrogant, but as far as i'm concerened, thats my own perogative. afterall, thats my driving mechanism.
sigh.
things get so complicated. half a year back, i was less of a friend. very much less. sidekick maybe, but friend? far far from it. instead, he had another. the 2 of them were like one, in a most safe sense. i was the third party butting in between the 2 of them, trying to squeeze into their conversations. i was often leftout, un-notified and had to fill myself in. never once before have i ever gotten a firsthand account from either of them. never.
but i pressed on. it was lamentable that some misfortune happened along the way and the 2 of them were no longer friends. i make my entrance here.
i saw it coming. of course i did.
it was verbaly foretold of through an interesting device known as the telephone.
maybe i could have salvaged the situation than.
i did try, but did i put in my utmost best?
i darent answer that question.
i was to some extent even secretly happy. i hate myself for feeling so.
what kind of friend was i? i dont really know. i just hope when others see this, they dont think - it revolved all around you.
there was a time i remebered, i asked, are you busy?
yeah.
ok, than i shant bother you.
after the 'break up',
are you busy?
kinda, but its ok.
sure? otherwise i'll bother you with chem.
yeah, yeah, what's the question? polymers? here's how.
now, i think its rather palpable that he's not in his best mood. i fear i might have triggered it off without my knowledge. but the conversation is more like the former.
i'm beginning to recall how he's put up with my nitty-gritty peccadillos.
this obviously isnt structured in any way. sometimes, you cant structure emotions, especially so when one's head is muddled between foreign currency and emotional investment. i know this is generally poorly written and doesnt truly reflect the tears shed after the phonecall.
team1 05 did well. won all 3 preliminary rounds. never mind the slight mess up in quaters. we're still very proud that you've managed to go thus far. abt the interpretation, better now than later. honestly, i prefer the NUS shield than one bearing NKF. maybe thats why there isnt one.
i'm in the mood to tinkle an Em9 on fresh acoustic strings and scream into nothingness with oasis- stop crying your heart out as background music.
yes. its a week away before the Olvl written papers actually begin, and i suddenly realize how emotionally attached one can get to another of his own.
God help me.